No Ma, it's not your fault.

Blame it on our genes. Too bad we cannot pick our parents. If we can, we may not be traumatised by a CABG (Coronary Artery Bypass Graft) due to blocked arteries [Link]

Having part of my heart muscles died on me followed by a ventricular fibrillation, I do appreciate the candour of Health Mintster Khaw Boon Wan in sharing his traumatic experience and showing off his hotbod to the public. I must say his almost perfect 'zipper' beats the stitches on the chests of my friends who had CABG before him.

I guess being a Health Mintster has its privileges and getting the best surgical team to cut one up and heal nicely would be a cinch. Just like one who is rich and powerful enough to charter a whole plane, convert it to a flying hospital and transport one's beloved wife from London to Singapore.

Lest I be accused of being malicious and callous and not being sympathetic and sensitive to a fellow cardiac patient, I wish everyone to know I'm just a bloke who went through a heart attack and ventricular defibrillation before and have accepted the fact that we deserve what we get. Karma or no karma, heaven or hell.

Having escaped the grim reaper and having the bonus of more than a decade of additional living years (which I'm most grateful for), I just wish Khaw to know that the great grandma of my granddaughter blamed herself for my heart attack. As she had and still has occasional angina, she felt responsible that my genes through her was the cause my heart attack. All I know is if she continued blaming herself, her own health would deteriorate. I'm glad I managed to convince her that my heart attack was no fault of hers.

Yes, it's convenient to blame someone else for the shituation that we are in. But to blame my mother and put her on a guilt trip for my heart attack would be just like

• A mintster mental blaming us for being daft in not accepting his dumb reasons for enriching his greedy mintsters.
  
  
• The arrogant "3 meals in in hawker centre, foodcourt or restaurant" mintster blaming us for being "small minded, unsportsmanlike and very, very selfish" for not supporting his silly idea of buying citizens from other country to buy instant sports honour and silverware for Singapore. What happens to the virtue of delayed gratification? Sorry, CBF is the word! It's cheaper, better and faster to buy than to train our own sportsmen and women.
  
  
• The powerfully blameless blaming someone else for being complacent when Mas Selamat jalan (walked) and beautiful graffiti appeared on the MRT train.
  

No Sir, let's not blame others for our own screw ups. As much as I can blame my genes for my health challenges, I can also blame my lifestyle, my diet and the air that I breathe. Yes, it can also be the stress of not being totally at peace with oneself, of not doing right to oneself and to others. Especially with the power and riches (and conscience) that one has.

So who do I blame for my heart attack? I blame myself for being weak, for not being strong enough to handle the challenges. For all I know, my next personal health challenge may be due to my lack of sleep, watching FIFA World Cup through the night and writing silly article like this during the the break between the 10pm match of Holland vs Slovakia and the 2.30am match of Brazil vs Chile.

Everyday, I live a little, I die a little and until finally I'll be fed to the fish.

Peace y'all and enjoy the World Cup.

feedmetothefish